Long Vacation

Long Vacation
2007.03.31 0:40

It occurred at age 3 when I was sufferred from measles. I had to stop playing with a guy who lived next to my house for three days. For me whose age was 3 it was a vacation long enough.
When I was sixteen I got a total nerve breakdown, probably. I had to take a rest for 3 months.
I had pnemonia at age 27 and I had to take a rest for full one month.
I had appendicitis at age 34 and I took a rest for 2 months.
At age 45 I was able to take a rest for 10 days thanks to the disease. It was strange though we are unable to take a rest or a vacation without having had some disease.

Global Heating

Global Heating
2007.03.31 0:09

Usually cherry blossoms flourished on 6th of April, here it is just the season of entrance ceremony in school, companies. This year it occurred one week earlier. Now unseasonally cherry blossoms flourished.
Several years ago the increase of infectious disease was predicted owing to the surge of temperature. Now the bacteria such as tuberculosis and tetanus were found in a backfin of some sea bream and the very person writing this journal was infected with such strong bacteria. Year by year the speed of global heating was accelarating.

Tuberculosis & Tetanus

Tuberculosis & Tetanus
2007.03.30 19:27

Those are what I had at the same time and I was in hospital in emergency cure unit for four consecutive nights from 25th of March to 28th March.
On 15th of March as usual I was trying to wash and cut a relatively big fish that is a kind of sea bream of about 30 cm long. I got a sting from some backfin in my right thumb. My thumb started swelling soon. My thumb kept on being imflammatory till 22nd of March when I found a part of my thumb sbruptly started making tubercules or small swellings - length 2 cm and width 1 cm. On the 23rd and 24th still I was waiting for my symptom's calming down itself but on 25th I found four other fingers of the right hand and part of muscles - brachioradialis in my right forearm started become stiffened. I went to hospital.
I got injected immuno globulin and intravenous drip infusion of antibiotics. Now I think I'm OK.

Ultimatum

Ultimatum
2007.03.22 4:34

I said I can't marry her, if it's OK for her to have love affair with me under this premise, I can continue.
She left my house.
It needs concession, whether she accepts my premise or I propose her. Her concession is difficult. Because it requires multiple standards for her. If she really loves me, she can't accept my offer.
I conceeded and our relation resumed.

Separation

Separation
2007.03.22 2:10

One day I said good-bye to her. She said good-bye to me and she left my house soon. After three days I said let's continue our relations and she agreed to do so. It's easy to separate, but it's easier not to separate.

Fornication & Adultery

Fornication & Adultery
2007.03.21 2:24

I encountered the strange word while I was reading a book, that is 'fornication'. Adultery is a familiar term, but what the hell fornication means? Several years ago our country had a 'fornication prohibition act', not a law but an act that only affects in some urban area. In this act, none can have sex with someone whose age is under 18 unless they were married. This act is somehow understandable in view of child protection, but how about in the case of unmarried couples whose age are over 18? This is very natural, and healthy.

Adultery means something if marriage regulates who has sex with someone, but in the first place does marriage regulate this? No, absolutely not. Marriage regulates economic relations of both genders (not 'parties'...yet). Sex is one of the most basic human activities for those who are over the period of adolescence. If ever fornication became guilty of some crime, that would be only the case that involves minors. When it comes to adultery, I stopped having physical relationship with my wife after we married.

Purple

Purple
2007.03.20 1:24

In ancient times to feudal age this colour was only allowed to be used among noble people. Therefore this colour was called forbidden colour. This colur made us feel awe.
This colour is made by mixing blue -male colur -reason and red -female colour -passion, so this colour connotes transvestism, inexplicable feeling, ambiguity, confusion, and neutrality.
The name of the river in my home town Kokura is the River Purple, because the surface of the river beautifully reflects a lot of plasma from the sunshine, but after a factory was constructed upper the river and flowed untransact water the colour of the river turned to the very purple, so people had long believed the river was named after the colour of the contaminated water.
In Auschwitz concentration camp this colour was used to show people differ neither from their national origin nor their sexual preference. Indeed they were constitued by various people but with the same faith. This sect was the only one that was severely persecuted under Nazis regime. For Nazis these people might have been as awesome as the colour they made worn.
The colour purple often makes us anxious, unstable, mystic, gnostic, anyway it is hard to grasp the atmosphere this colour gives off.

Sorry

Sorry
2007.03.19 2:42

I said sorry twice to her. She replied, 'why you say sorry?'
No one starts loving someone without seriously thinking about the possibility of marrying her in the future. I was so just like others. I realised I can't, yet I said sorry to her. It takes courage to say good-bye to her. I do it when I thought it inevitable to say so. But how easily I said sorry to her. Sorry is the word that means I was not serious. But in the past I was serious when my counterpart then said sorry to me. I didn't hear that word for the same reason above but it is also truth I felt some console.

Naming

Naming
2007.03.19 2:12

I've been always thinking John's Apocalyps is a strange naming since I read it at age 16. This book is poetically speaking undoubtedly one of the greatest book ever, but just a book is filled with a lot of symbolic expression. I think it scarecely revealed concretely. However the title of the book is Revelation. Probably for those who got a far-reaching insight can only see through those mystic expressions. Here is also the area where faith works.

The Meaning Of Marriage

The Meaning Of Marriage
2007.03.19 1:49

Any women hope marriage. Any women in love particulary strongly hope to get married to their lovers. Marriage is not a goal of their love but simply it regulates the economic relations between two opposite sexes. In marriage men have to share not only a time for their physical pleasure, mutual conversation but above all of things their fortune -economy, with women.

Answer

Answer
2007.03.19 1:27

There's an answer for a particular question.
I attend the Sunday service of church, in which a clergy man asked the attendants why our effort in preaching work is not in vain.
I knew the answer, the answer I thought it correct was 'because we have a hope in life at the kingdom of God' I heard several noticeable people were replying to the question. I was about to raise my hand, but I couldn't. I was attending the service, but of course I'm a secular person. I was unable to speak out the correct answer even though I knew it correct. One can't say anything that is unbelievable yet.

Liberation

Liberation
2007.03.19 1:07

I feel so liberated. Our relation finished. For the first time in 10 months I completely came to be alone. For this period I call her or mail her at least one time in a day. I don't need to communicate with her any more. I will enjoy being alone for a couple of months. I had to love a woman who lived far from here two times adding the period of long distance love for 3 or 4 years, which made me so nervous.
Next love must be a woman who resides in the same city, must understand our universal language, must share the similar value in a way as to how to grasp life, but for the moment I'd like to enjoy being a single.

Separation

Separation
2007.03.19 0:39

Separation has come before the real separation took place. I wanted to separate from her already in last summer. The reason I've been seeing her was my search for the curiosity with her in physical ways was over the agony to communicate with her in verbal ways. Recently I noticed my agony was overwhelmed my pleasure. It was already a matter of time for me to say good-bye to her. If I was able to see her almost everyday I didn't have to take such a long period to put an end to our relations. It must have been one season, but it came to be almost a year. Once a week in a weekend -it was our only occasion to spend a night. Another reason might be my love to her. I didn't want her to feel shocked when she heard my saying good-bye. But it seems I did't have to worry about it. She was already fully ready to accept the result of our love regardless of whether it bore fuites or nill.
I have already noticed she's not in the least suitable to me. She is a colleage in my company and that made us encounter and it was the only factor we could share.

A Roman Citizen

A Roman Citizen
2007.03.17 5:21

I was reading acts last night. I finished it tonight. He was also seized and about to be indicted, but he got away with it because he insisted he see Caesar and he was a Roman citizen. Both two factors were important in the same degree. When he was in danger he boldly insisted he's a Roman citizen as Roman citizens are not allowed to be confined without charges. And he always insisted he's not guilty. He didn't admit any charges against him. He was a Jew and a Christian, but above all of things he was a Roman citizen who never stopped claiming his innocence. God helped those who helped themselves.

Life

Life
2007.03.15 2:25

Life depends on how we interpret it. Life is merely an interpretation.

Obstacles

Obstacles
2007.03.15 2:15

I am apt to resort to my personal background when I encountered obstacles in front of my goal. My personal background itself is a story. There's a good time as well as a bad time, but to tell the truth that doesn't tell anything to others, instead those informations often mislead to wrong assumptions on me, and that's not what I wanted you to do. As a conclusion I have firmly decided to close all information as to me myself. I myself stand firmly on my own without being valued by other criteria other than my own writings. Only my writings will value me.

Inconsistency Of Revelation

There are something that I cannot reveal.

There are something that I don't have to reveal.

There are something that I'd better not reveal.

Those three happened to be categorised under the same name -things that is not to be revealed. But actually, these three are different and show one extremity itself.

I used to say there's no privacy in writers, but actually almost all things are not written.

Revelation

Revelation
2007.03.13 2:29

There are something that I cannot reveal.
There are something that I don't have to reveal.
There are something that I'd better not reveal.
Those three happened to be the same -that is never revealed.

Tax

At the end of the fiscal year usually in March here and there we find many construction sites on the road as sprouts. Many of them are necessary.

Mayor of this city is just one year senior to me and the first term mayor. The name of the company on the back of the truck was shinning under the sun.

Park

Park
2007.03.13 0:57

A small pond, a beautiful path..people like to build a house beside the park. Usually around noon, cars started gathering the road beside the park. Some of them don't turn their engine off, that makes noise and constant exhausted gasses. This is a sarcastic fact about park.

Stained Glass

Stained Glass
2007.03.13 0:36

The house of the next next block made a very beautiful stained glass.
The house of the next block made a very beautiful stained glass, too.
But lastly the house of the next block put the two white metal supports crosswise on the stained glass to strengthen or not to break. That makes the stained glass very ugly. I wonder what was the purpose to have made it. It ought to have been we can enjoy the beautiful stained glass. But it became to preserve it.

Abstinence

Abstinence

2007.03.09 3:59

Abstinence is not a virtue. But if the two opposite sexes who lead the life of total abstinence succeeded in making a miraculous coupling, that would be called a virtue itself.

Copper Beggar

Copper Beggar
2007.03.08 2:20

Electric cables have been stolen throughout Japan recently.
In 1404 Japan started trade with Ming Dynasty in China. Shogun then wanted millions of Chinese copper money that prevailed throughout Asia those days. Instead he sent tens of gold in amazingly inequivalent exchange rate. Abundant gold was used to the surface of the Golden Pavillion. At that time Japan was able to come up relatively lots of gold.
Time has passed and the time is 2007. Japan became a country of full of copper. Much copper was used in electric cables and now started being stolen and sent back to China to obtain a bit of money.
Mean Japanese, let's not steal such a mean public property!

Steel Stealer

Steel Stealer
2007.03.08 1:43

Recently we have had many news that reports many stainless steels have been stolen. Gratings, chains on the pavement in the mountain roads, guardrails, etc. This is the sadness of the country that has scarce natural resources. Those materials are made up from the tax. Thiefs started squeezing human resources.

Snowfall In March

Snowfall In March
2007.03.08 1:29

These two or three days it's been so cold that we had a snowfall in March. I feel unwell.

Two Defects On Love

Two Defects On Love
2007.03.06 0:21

When I was 38, I had had a 43 year old girlfriend. One night she told me candidly, honestly, and contemplatively that her defect is she can't love someone. I usually love someone when I'm in love with the one. I can't love others while I was in love. Therefore I am suffered from the lack of love, if she's away or she's about to say good-by. If I don't love anyone, I wouldn't be suffered from anything at all. I love someone. For me it's my defect.

The Essence Of Religion

The Essence Of Religion
2007.03.05 23:51

We rely on God when we found no way out. If we can find a way out, we rely on ourselves. But because we can't find a way out, we rely on God. It doesn't matter whether God will give us a solution. God might give us a solution or might not give us a solution. We rely on God. -That is a solution.

Eternal Recurrence

I can't get an answer even if I thought it over and over again. I can find many Japanese expression for this state of my mind, though, it's hard to verbalise in English. Probably, no way out, thinking thinking over with no conclusion, cul-de-sac, self food poisoning, conflict along with two opposit values. Oh, I recall it. It's catch 22.

Japanese Cars & German Cars

Japanese Cars & German Cars
2007.03.05 22:48

There are many cars in Toyota, but each car has a brand name like Camry, Carina, Corolla, Corona, Crown, Celica...though, strangely the names of many cars in Toyota starts from the letter C. Not only Toyotas but other Japanese car companies as well have their brand names as many as the number of kinds.
Behold German cars. Benz, BMW has many cars but we call them by numbers, not particular names other than the name of the companies.
Is that the endorsement of their confidence?

Just Four Words

Just Four Words
2007.03.05 3:14

One foreigner visited our premises. I was able to hear only four words when I crossed his team members that comes from Tokyo headquarters. Even just a piece of language he speaks can tell everything from his educational backgroud, his native country, his family background. I was ablle to know from the four words he uttered.
His parents are Dutch -he didn't have a particular accent that native American usually have and also from his surname, he was raised in east coast -yet his pronunciation was relatively clear so, his education was probably master of business administration -judging also from his position.
Hahaha...no one can say whether it's wrong since I was the only one who heard his words. What was his words? It was 'ten o'clock thirty minutes'
In European people it's much easier to tell, but it's often hard to do so in the case of Americans.

Smoking Gun

Smoking Gun
2007.03.05 2:33

In a television programme that introduces the culture of Japan, kokeshi dolls are often shown. This object is said to be invented in early 19 century in hot springs in the northern part of Japan, that is Tohoku. This object is always explained as a souvenir or a toy in public publication. But in fact the history of kokeshi is much older and used very differently than just an ornament. I have read this object was used to eliminate a child just before their birth in Tohoku, literally East-North region where famine was common throughout the history of Japan. This theory is even more explicable if it were used in hot springs, where prostitution was also common in those days.
Final assumption was made from the word itself, in kokeshi, ko means a child and keshi means an eliminator. They couldn't eliminate the name itself even though anyone forgot the abhorrent history along with the object itself.

Storm

Storm
2007.03.05 1:13

A storm in this season is very unusual. 994 hecto pascal low pressure system is over the sky of the Korean Peninsula. The height of wave at sea reaches 6 to 7 metres. The velocity of wind at sea is 20 to 25 metres, and that of it at land is 10 to 15 metres. The temperature here also rises till 10 lowest, to 12 highest, centigrades. The precipitation will be 40 millimetres per an hour.

Perfect Sunday

Perfect Sunday
2007.03.04 23:50

Last Sunday I had to work so all the more I felt we had a splendid Sunday today. She came to my room last night and we spent free hours till 15:30, then we went out. No wind, moderate sunshine. Everything was just perfect.
After she took a long-distance bus at 17:20, the climate started changing abruptly and now we are having one of the most windy night over here. I feel we were able to evade bad weather successfully, so that makes me feel it's a good day even more.

Wise Woman

Wise Woman
2007.03.04 23:06

On the way back to her town I told her that I'd like to buy her a present. Two weeks ago she asked me to buy either a neckless, or a ring for her. We went to a jewellery shop.
First place we went was a ground floor of the department store. The average price was an intermediate, all were around $200 -300. She picked up some but I said no to all.
Next we went to upsairs. On the 6th floor we found a very luxury jewellery shop, all were stored in a showcase. The average price was $1000 -1500. I said all are beyond my imagination.
We changed the store. We went to a semi-department store for the young. We can get a good item in a reasonable price. We went to the ground floor and found a bracelet- till that time she told me that she could ok to choose a bracelet, instead of a ring that has a special meaning for us lovers, instead of a neckless that is much more expensive than other ornaments.
We found a very good silver bracelet. The cost was $42.

Fever

Fever
2007.03.04 22:20

I have had a fever for about a week. Last Monday I had to work only two hours from 10 to noon. The rest of the day was off. I had to work on the last Sunday. Usually Sunday is dayoff. So all those caused a slight ailment that is a fever, though it is not in the least I can call it a cold.
Many years ago I read a medical article that says that the fever is a natural reaction of our body to protect ourselves, in other words a fever generates itself in a process our body fight against the intrusion of viruses that causes disease.
Last night I found my wet hair dried up on its own after I took a bath, usually I need to use a dryer, etc., because of the fever of myself dried the water on the hair.
Fever, you are not ignorable.

Gift

Gift
2007.03.03 5:22

I had had a girl whom I liked in my 5th grade. One day I brought her a white stone that has unusual regular spots in it. She was closely watching them, pointing out those regular spots saying 'it's strange, isn't it?'. I said I gave it to you if you liked it. It was beyond my expectation, though, she was very glad to accept it.
The next day she brought me five or six foreign coins, those are from Europe, saying her father brought her house after he went abroad.
We were on good terms with one another for a while. Gift means poison in German. Sometimes poison works on our love well.
Now she became a doctor and had three kids. I hope I'd be a writer as she had expected.

Cult

Cult
2007.03.03 5:00

The definition of cult is ambiguous and I don't want to be a member of cult. But if I found the group whose constituents have the similar belief or view over almost all matters, I am certain I feel much secured than now. I would feel so especially if I were able to find a partner whom I intend to be with for the rest of my life.
My long distance love makes me nervous than one year ago.

Cult

Cult
2007.03.03 5:00

The definition of cult is ambiguous and I don't want to be a member of cult. But if I found the group whose constituents have the similar belief or view over almost all matters, I am certain I feel much secured than now. I would feel so especially if I were able to find a partner whom I intend to be with for the rest of my life.
My long distance love makes me nervous than one year ago.

Styx

Styx
2007.03.03 4:29

On the rainy day the evaporated breath inside the room forms a thin layer on the window. We often write scribles on it, sometimes it was my name or just try writing a beloved one if no one see this.
At age 21 I managed to enter the university. I entered it after spending two years outside a regular course. I entered it three years later than the students of the same age.
I remeber writing 'Styx' on it some day in my first year. I managed to get out of the abyss. For two years before entering the school, I was struggling with the decomposition of my character. I saw the real figure of this world through the transparent word for a while.
A woman stopped to watch the word in the diningroom of our dormitory.

Game

Game
2007.03.02 1:03

Believe or not, I'm a fanatic person. In my latter-half of twenties some months after I started teaching in a cram school, I was extremely enthusiastic with spending my pastime in an amusement corner, here we call 'game centre'. I was extremely particular about keep on playing two games, one was a poker and the other was shotgun game. In a shotgun game we need to know the pattern -when a monster appears, or how we can get through in order to avoid encountering obstacles, etc. So naturally the more we play, the farther we can go. It took one dollar for one play.
In poker a girl takes off her clothing every time she looses, as many other card games as well this game consisted in the utilisation of male's instinct. It took tremendous hours and money. I remember I spent $1000 combined. I finished getting through to the end eventually. I was able to feel a full of satisfaction.
One year later when I went to Dublin I found the same machine at the very centre of downtown Dublin. I made it through in just one time try. After I finished, I turned back finding 5 or 6 people standing and watching after me. I was a hero. People must have thought I was able to do it because I'm Asian, but the fact was only I had just learned all patterns every nook and cranny. But how about how to take off clothings of a girl.
Still learning. Life is not a game.

Commencement

Commencement
2007.03.01 23:57

I didn't attend the graduation ceremony in high school. Because I thought I would be unable to summarise my 4 years in high school days at only one day-the very day of graduation. 6 years later I didn't attend the graduation ceremony in university. Because I intended to have kept on learning also after the very day of graduation.
This is regarded as the appearance of my wish to eternity, continuity, or immortality, since graduation is not the end of one period but the first step to another commencement.